55....56....57....58....59....The clock struck 1200hrs!!!!!!

It's finally here!!!! It's official!!!!! I've finally grown!!!!!!!

I've finally grown...do you see it?? do you??? Feel it?? Don't???

Haha of coz you don't and you won't....coz it's for ME!!!!

The official hour on the official day...am i happy?? you bet i am!!!!

Actually, which part of me grown??? *tots

Read all my past entries and realised that i didn't really blog much this year. Some of the entries made me laugh and some made me realise how helpless i have been but the good thing is, i've grown....Oh my, look how much i've grown...*winks*

I've grown wiser, matured, patience and kind. I learnt to accept facts and be less temperamental. Well, some part of me is still the same. Trust me, it is still me....

1 more day to go....*smiles* Am i really growing?? Sama je...

A surprise celebration given by my office buddies and that's my first advance birthday cake with i dont quite remember how many candles were there *smiles*

Million of thanks to Lytle Precious and my frens...the celebration was great and this is only the beginning!!!!

A colleague of mind received a bouquet of pink roses and im jealous, but since its pink, i'm not entirely that jealous... *winks*

2 mores days and i'm looking forward to the plans made with Lytle Precious. Dinner with my galfren which is much younger than i am but always scolding me and who loves me alot too...garang budak kecik tu, jangan main giler...

Very very busy today and i didnt realise that it has past 1730hrs...oh my, time really flies!!!!

Got to know from KS alot of unreasonable office rules will be implemented real soon. Im so so tired now.....

I've got my bikini!!!! yeah finally.....

My GF is back from her holiday in Australia and yes i've got my koala but the sad thing is, my KOALA shedding its furs!!!!! Balding soon...patches here and there.. Maybe its the weather *winks*

10 more day frens....baby blue roses.....

I wonder why human beings are never grateful and appreciate the things or people which they know are precious treasures in each individual life.

As humans, we have the intelligent mind and eyes to see and know the sacrifices, sincerity and faithfulness but yet we disappoint their efforts and treat them bad without knowing. Humans are ignorant and selfish of others and always think as oneself is always right. Ego is the major character in us all. Pride kills the innocent.

I wonder why humans are so afraid of admitting mistakes and true feelings of themselves. Why cant humans spare a thought of the people around us? Our family, our love ones and our friends. Why do we deny the fact? Losing someone or something treasured preciously are not the experience that anyone on earth ever want to face but then humans are to proud or egoistic to admit.

I dont deny experience teach us all to be wiser but isnt it right to correct the wrongs rather then give up and dont face it. It actually hurts even more when we live in denial as no one knows that accept ourselves.

For me, i do not want to lose anything or anyone which is very precious to me and marks my life as a human being.

And so i tot, i was right but then i was wrong...
And so i tot, i was strong but then i am so weak...
And so i tot, my believes are true but then it is just a dream of fairytale stories...

What have i lacked??
What have i done wrong??
What have i not shown??

Everyday i wake up hoping for a bright and lovely day, yet it is still dull and cloudy...
My mind is still lost over hopes. Missing all i have seem to lose.
Praying hard for all to come back to life as it use to be and till the day comes everyday is the same.

My one and only wish of a lifetime is yet to be fulfilled.

Weekend was a drag...time past sooooooooo slowly that it killed me every second the clock ticked.

Was out with Kikin & Ijal on Friday to Marina, in search of a bridesmaid dress for Andy's Wedding. Time past so slowly...did some catch up with them and since there's no other plans for Friday, i went home and slept early...

Here comes Saturday....we have planned to go out that nite but yeah it screwed up big time. Thank god i was out in the day for a while with lytle precious and met up an old fren at nite at my void deck and slept early again...

My Old Fren is back from perth for two weeks. Can't wait to meet up with him and the rest of the frens...He say's he is as round as a fishball...lives up to the nick 'montel'. He's now busy with his galfren so shall not disturb him as yet.

Im so hooked up to this song 'Give it Up to Me Remix'....thank to lytle precious, im so addicted to it.

I need to get a bikini. The one i tried at Bugis makes me feel fat, boobless and big ass woman...*sobs* Wateva it is, im still in search for a sexy bikini...probably black and gold *winks*

I broke my precious bracelet and i dont even realise it that its off my wrist.... *sobs* Its not just a bracelet...its a present given by my precious sister....sorry babe i dont mean too...

Haiz....i broke the bracelet :( Now i feel so bad and naked...

The trip is on!!!!! Bought the ticket yesterday and off we will go in August!!!!

Spent some time with Lytle Precious...short but worthwhile.

Last nite was a reminiscence of my childhood days...oh my god, please put it faraway from thoughts....Never let it repeat again.

21 more days....i cant wait.

I think i want to get myself a bikini...should i buy it black, red or white??? *tots*

Time pass quite fast today....No Boss Day!!!!! No boss, no tense....i'm free to do whatever i want to do... *smiles*

Happy Birthday to PRECIOUS's brother....

22 more days to mine...Been having sleepless nite. Maybe i'm worried about the THING....

How will my Birthday celebration be this year???? *tots*

Need a break....i really need a break....*sighs*

Today, somewhere 3 years ago marks the first happy nite outing with someone close to the heart...Today is also my youngest brother's 10th birthday.

Today, i am feeling very sad, pissed, worried and disappointed.

What's in my mind and what's in my heart, people dont know. Dont understand.

Everything seem to be wrong...Our mind only see what our heart wishes to see. Patience goes a long way...So i will continue to be patience till forever.

Who noes when that one day will come where my sorrow, pain, fear, sadness & misery will be taken away and be replaced with peaceful happiness...no one noes when it will happen and till it happens, i will juz hope for the best out of everything.

I feel at times, i've lost the battle and should juz give up but yet the fire burn so strong, it couldnt be put out.